Well, the time is nigh! Pre-op appointment was yesterday afternoon, surgery is next Tuesday, the 17th! I have spent the last month inundating myself with information, FB groups, blog posts, success stories, pins for recipes, protein powder subscriptions, etc. I am ready. The fears are lessened as I armor myself with support and information, and I know that with prayer and the right attitude and determination, I can become the person God has designed me to be.
As part of all the various support groups I have become part of, I have learned some new terminology. Daily, actually multiple times daily, various persons within these groups will share parts of their journeys. Almost always, these posts include their "stats". Their HW/SW/CW/GW, being their high weight, surgery weight, current weight, and goal weight. In that vein, I wanted to share MY stats, as a way to reinforce my beliefs and goals throughout the upcoming marathon journey.
HW: My high weight was the point when I thought, "this is not who I am". It was when I decided that while I love healthy food, love trying new recipes with quinoa and kale, that I still had a fundamental problem with certain foods and self-control. It was the moment I allowed the truth to ring free for me: my body and my genetics are unique, and losing weight is nearly impossible on my own. That's a hard truth to be ok with, because other people diet and lose weight. Other people cut out Cokes and drop 20lbs. BUT I'M NOT OTHER PEOPLE.
SW: I actually had to weigh in at my pre-op appointment yesterday, but I didn't focus too much on the scale. My surgery weight was the moment my husband (the best ever) said, "I've watched you struggle with this for a dozen years, let's try the surgery." Y'all. We're paying for this out-of-pocket. It ain't cheap, but with the support of my spouse, it's possible. That is love and marriage right there. My SW also happened when I decided for myself that I didn't have to answer to outsiders about my decision to seek out bariatric surgery. There is no shame attached to this decision, it is without a doubt what is best for my health and longevity.
CW: My current weight is that place where I'm still nervous about whether or not I'll be truly successful in the long-term. There are nerves about recovery, eating correctly, getting the right vitamins, having clothes to wear, answering people's questions at Thanksgiving and Christmas, and holding my head high when people cast judgment on my decisions. This is where support is crucial, because I'll stay at this weight the longest, really for the rest of my life.
GW: This one is the easiest. Really I could just slap a number up here and everyone would either think "That's it? That's still a LOT." or "You don't need to be that thin!". But I've never been one to seek out easy, so my goal weight is a little more complex. My goal weight is learning how to do a cartwheel. It's shopping anywhere other than the "plus-size" section. It's teaching my kids about the balance of nutrition and exercise in order to honor God through honoring our bodies. My GW is being comfortable with myself when I look in the mirror and knowing that God sees a Princess of the Kingdom of Heaven. It's taking a fitness class and kicking butt. It's living to be 100 and still walking on my own. That is my goal weight.
I have spent my entire life breaking against the chain of having my worth defined by a number on the scale. Why would I start valuing myself that way now? I am not a number, I am Katye. I am redeemed and loved beyond measure. I am a mother, a wife, a daughter, sister, and friend. My body does not define me, it only works with me to achieve my goals and God's plans. So for those reasons, I say #screwthescale.
As part of all the various support groups I have become part of, I have learned some new terminology. Daily, actually multiple times daily, various persons within these groups will share parts of their journeys. Almost always, these posts include their "stats". Their HW/SW/CW/GW, being their high weight, surgery weight, current weight, and goal weight. In that vein, I wanted to share MY stats, as a way to reinforce my beliefs and goals throughout the upcoming marathon journey.
HW: My high weight was the point when I thought, "this is not who I am". It was when I decided that while I love healthy food, love trying new recipes with quinoa and kale, that I still had a fundamental problem with certain foods and self-control. It was the moment I allowed the truth to ring free for me: my body and my genetics are unique, and losing weight is nearly impossible on my own. That's a hard truth to be ok with, because other people diet and lose weight. Other people cut out Cokes and drop 20lbs. BUT I'M NOT OTHER PEOPLE.
SW: I actually had to weigh in at my pre-op appointment yesterday, but I didn't focus too much on the scale. My surgery weight was the moment my husband (the best ever) said, "I've watched you struggle with this for a dozen years, let's try the surgery." Y'all. We're paying for this out-of-pocket. It ain't cheap, but with the support of my spouse, it's possible. That is love and marriage right there. My SW also happened when I decided for myself that I didn't have to answer to outsiders about my decision to seek out bariatric surgery. There is no shame attached to this decision, it is without a doubt what is best for my health and longevity.
CW: My current weight is that place where I'm still nervous about whether or not I'll be truly successful in the long-term. There are nerves about recovery, eating correctly, getting the right vitamins, having clothes to wear, answering people's questions at Thanksgiving and Christmas, and holding my head high when people cast judgment on my decisions. This is where support is crucial, because I'll stay at this weight the longest, really for the rest of my life.
GW: This one is the easiest. Really I could just slap a number up here and everyone would either think "That's it? That's still a LOT." or "You don't need to be that thin!". But I've never been one to seek out easy, so my goal weight is a little more complex. My goal weight is learning how to do a cartwheel. It's shopping anywhere other than the "plus-size" section. It's teaching my kids about the balance of nutrition and exercise in order to honor God through honoring our bodies. My GW is being comfortable with myself when I look in the mirror and knowing that God sees a Princess of the Kingdom of Heaven. It's taking a fitness class and kicking butt. It's living to be 100 and still walking on my own. That is my goal weight.
I have spent my entire life breaking against the chain of having my worth defined by a number on the scale. Why would I start valuing myself that way now? I am not a number, I am Katye. I am redeemed and loved beyond measure. I am a mother, a wife, a daughter, sister, and friend. My body does not define me, it only works with me to achieve my goals and God's plans. So for those reasons, I say #screwthescale.
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